Hands of Heaven DVD

I often read this blog called adailyscoop.blogspot.com. It is written by a mother who lost her little girl by drowning in their backyard spa. She was only 14 months old when she died a year ago. Someone had forwarded me her blog and said that I should read it after Porters accident. I have found so much strength and comfort in her words, honesty, testimony and strength. She seems like a truly amazing woman. In one of her posts I found she talked about an Enrichment night where they played a DVD called Hands of Heaven, about friends gettting friends through different trials. It sounded interesting so I clicked on the link and ordered it.
I got it in the mail a few days ago and didn't watch it until tonight. At first I was turned off by it and a little dissapointed. I didn't realize that the whole story was told in still frame photos. It felt a little cheesy and I had a hard time focusing on the story. But I decided to just give it a try and finish watching it.
There were 4 friends each with different trials they had to help eachother get through. The 4th girls story seemed like it was just the conclusion of how she didnt have a major trial, she was just thankful for her friends and how they are so close. As she is talking and telling the story you hear her little girl in the background screaming for her because her little sister had fallen in the pool. It shows her jumping in the pool, performing CPR and the struggle and questions of why she wasnt breathing or why this wasn't working. What were they doing wrong? I began to cry and was overcome with emotion. I was totally relating to this woman. I couldn't help but think of Porter's accident and replayed it in my mind. I related to her when she was put in the ambulance on a gurney in nothing but her swimming suit, the questioning of whether or not her daughter would be alright, would she still be the same little girl, what complications would come of this? As I was watching it I felt so much comfort. It was the first time in a year that I felt like I finally had justification for my feelings. It was such a hard trial, still is hard, I still think of it every day, I still cry when I tell the story, I still hold Porter a few minutes longer each night and thank my heavenly father that he is able to be with us.

As the DVD goes on I felt as though it was my exact story being told. As if she was telling my exact thoughts, the struggles I faced. The guilt, depression, confusion, who could I talk to that would understand.
I truly feel like this is the first time I have ever found something or someone that I have somewhat related with. I felt a little crazy that I had such a hard time but didn't lose my little boy. I couldnt talk it out with other moms who had lost their children, because my pain wasn't nearly on their same level. I also realized that I have learned so much and have grown so much from that experience.
Its a great DVD if you want to order it, watch it and maybe pass it along to someone you think would be healed from it. I was!
I thought of so many of you with your own trials that you are being faced with and realized how much comfort I draw from your strength.
Thank you to all those that helped me through this trial, who continue to help me through other trials and who uplift me without even realizing it. If you are reading this, then that probably means I am referring to you in some way. So thanks!